Relationships

Relationships with people are crucial to our personal growth and development.We learn about our own reactions to others, the way we feel and think about them and ourselves. Rich social life helps us to mature, to be flexible and open to differences in our relationships with people.

Relationship types:
- family
- by law
- life partner
- sexual partner
- business partener
- work colleague
- acquaintance
- friend
- best friend
- other relationship (neighbours, teachers, professionals, friends of friends etc)

Close relationships can be tricky and often requires hard work. However the shared moments of enjoyment and happy memories make up for the effort. There are days when we love being around people, we feel comfortable and fully enjoy their company. Sometimes we don't feel like talking to anyone and sending a text seems like hard work. It is ok to have a quiet time to ourselves every so often. When we go through life crises sometimes we don't want anyone to know how we feel.
Friends should be there for us for the good and the difficult moments.

How to maintain close relationships?

1. Contact and the ability to communicate

a) keep in touch
It is important to keep in touch. The contact should be more regular with family, partners and close friends. It is good to keep in touch with people we like and feel comfortable with. Depending on how busy are we and how close are we to the other person an email or a visit once in a while could be enough. It is important to make an effort. If you feel that you are the one who gets in touch 60-70%  of  time and you feel that the other person doesn't bother - analyse the situation. Check if this has always been the case or maybe it's temporary, because the person me be busy or has been recently going through some significant changes in their life.

b) clear communication
If something negative happened in your relationship and you are not happy with it, be open and talk about it. If you feel there is something wrong, more then likely the other person feels likewise. Don't be judgemental neither aggressive when you communicate your concern.

- Explain how you feel using "I" rather then blaming the other person using "you"
 i.e. "I feel uncomfortable" vs "you make me feel uncomfortable".
- Don't generalize, give an example
- Listen to what the other person has to say (see my blog: How to listen?)
- Ask questions (see my blog: How to listen?)

If the relationship means a lot, you will eventually come up with a conclusion.
Remember it's not about winning it's about partnership and cooperation!